phragle
Charter Member
chapter 1
I got up friday at 8, well the alarm went off at 8, I smacked the snooze button a few times.. those little Asian guys who build the clocks need to learn a thing or two from tonka, becuase I cant get one to last more than 6 months. Maybe it's because the damn thing destroys sleep, the voices are silent when I sleep, that damn machine wakes them up screaming.
I climbed out of bed and crawled to the kitchen...fruit loops and coffee..more coffee and a smoke..more coffee and I may be coherent enough for a shower. Now with the wonderfull springtime fresh aroma surrounding me I head to the shop to trade the caddie for the motorhome. I make a stop on the way for more coffee. The motor home starts, life is good. it's got a half tank of gas of dubious vintage.. life is better. I pull the unweildly beast into the store, watching innocent shoppers run for cover. Why doesn't sunoco have shopping carts? a case of beer, a couple 2 liters of pepsi, 3 paks of smokes, a couple hundred bucks out of the ATM, more coffee. The beast doesn't fit down my driveway, my brother discovered this last year when he disconnected the cable tv. I pull into the park/senior center next door, jump the parking blocks and curb, grass is torn, mounds of dirt tossed thru the air as I bound into the sideyard in a full lock drift. Somebodies grandfather is starring at me from the door of the senior center.I have a race to get to, he needs valium. All I have is uppers, no downers, I scream across the parking lot "Gramps, you want a beer?" he walks back inside. I load the motorhome, wheres the cooler? I look in the center console, I look in the nova..front porch, back porch..where is it?? I call my brother..most likely culprit... it's in his Tiara. it's a mess, wheres the boat soap, bubbles..glorious cooler cleaning bubbles. it has alcohol inside, beer and some kind of foofoo pink chick drink stuff. I left that on the dock. Either the seagulls can drink it or my brother can see it and question his manhood. Bill's at the gas pump, asks me where I'm going. The races..I offer him a beer, he says it's not even 10am yet, I crack one while asking "whats your point" "I guess I don't have one" Bill cracks a beer. Back to Sunoco to get ice.why I didn't do the whole sunoco deal in one trip is beyond me. It's morning. the only redeeming quality of morning is that they keep me from hating afternoons.
I got up friday at 8, well the alarm went off at 8, I smacked the snooze button a few times.. those little Asian guys who build the clocks need to learn a thing or two from tonka, becuase I cant get one to last more than 6 months. Maybe it's because the damn thing destroys sleep, the voices are silent when I sleep, that damn machine wakes them up screaming.
I climbed out of bed and crawled to the kitchen...fruit loops and coffee..more coffee and a smoke..more coffee and I may be coherent enough for a shower. Now with the wonderfull springtime fresh aroma surrounding me I head to the shop to trade the caddie for the motorhome. I make a stop on the way for more coffee. The motor home starts, life is good. it's got a half tank of gas of dubious vintage.. life is better. I pull the unweildly beast into the store, watching innocent shoppers run for cover. Why doesn't sunoco have shopping carts? a case of beer, a couple 2 liters of pepsi, 3 paks of smokes, a couple hundred bucks out of the ATM, more coffee. The beast doesn't fit down my driveway, my brother discovered this last year when he disconnected the cable tv. I pull into the park/senior center next door, jump the parking blocks and curb, grass is torn, mounds of dirt tossed thru the air as I bound into the sideyard in a full lock drift. Somebodies grandfather is starring at me from the door of the senior center.I have a race to get to, he needs valium. All I have is uppers, no downers, I scream across the parking lot "Gramps, you want a beer?" he walks back inside. I load the motorhome, wheres the cooler? I look in the center console, I look in the nova..front porch, back porch..where is it?? I call my brother..most likely culprit... it's in his Tiara. it's a mess, wheres the boat soap, bubbles..glorious cooler cleaning bubbles. it has alcohol inside, beer and some kind of foofoo pink chick drink stuff. I left that on the dock. Either the seagulls can drink it or my brother can see it and question his manhood. Bill's at the gas pump, asks me where I'm going. The races..I offer him a beer, he says it's not even 10am yet, I crack one while asking "whats your point" "I guess I don't have one" Bill cracks a beer. Back to Sunoco to get ice.why I didn't do the whole sunoco deal in one trip is beyond me. It's morning. the only redeeming quality of morning is that they keep me from hating afternoons.
