Thread: Texts From Last Night
Results 61 to 80 of 1951
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- Join Date
- Oct 2008
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- 291
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- Join Date
- Nov 2008
- Location
- Naples, FL
- Posts
- 1,702
06-02-2009 07:39 PMfat chicks update:
(415): How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
(305): Thanks for jumping on that grenade for me last night. You're the best wingman ever
(615): She ate 7 of the 8 slices of pizza. I deserve a purple heart and sex w your sister
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06-02-2009 07:57 PM
I have a buddy i need to do this to..
(919): There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
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06-02-2009 08:26 PM
(513): Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
(626): What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
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06-07-2009 10:42 PM
(952): I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fuking part Iowa.
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06-07-2009 11:54 PM
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party!
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- Join Date
- Oct 2008
- Posts
- 215
06-08-2009 10:22 AM(704): You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
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- Join Date
- Nov 2008
- Location
- Naples, FL
- Posts
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06-08-2009 03:52 PM(315): That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
(541): You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
(732): You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
(248): i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
(707): I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and f*ck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
(951): That's the thing about women.
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06-08-2009 04:20 PM
(pengy): Drunk text
now thats creativity at its finest....P-4077 "The Swamp" S.B.Y.C. and Michigan medboat mothership
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06-08-2009 04:25 PM
we have all had those moments....
P-4077 "The Swamp" S.B.Y.C. and Michigan medboat mothership
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- Join Date
- Oct 2008
- Posts
- 215
06-09-2009 08:46 AM(504): Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
(408): booty call
(925): i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pu**y.
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06-09-2009 10:25 AM
Is there something wrong with the fact that I see a big up side to this one?
(513): Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
"Tear gas and draft beer don't mix."
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06-09-2009 12:15 PM
(641): are you wasted or are you getting laid?
(515): ebdebdebdebd
(641): wowUnstoppable f'n terror.