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Buoy
10-21-2008, 07:56 PM
I'd love to take credit for this, but the Pirate that posted this deserves every bit of credit for the creed.
This is the type of brilliance that comes out of some of the members that are on this site.
Let me see if it'll let me do this in my next post - we're all still learning here.

Buoy
10-21-2008, 07:57 PM
1. THou shall have no other boats before me

2. Thou shall not boat on flat water

3. THou shall not take the phrase "resin bucket" in vein.

4. Remember the poker run day, keep it holy

5. Honor your boat and its creator

6. THou shall not sink your boat

7. Thou shall not have ugly or fat women on your boat unless they possess the knowledge to mix a mojito, clean and cook a grouper, or change a gimbal bearing

8. Thou shall not under trim

9. Thou shall not bear false witness to the speed of your vessel

10. Thou shall not covet any boat that belongs to Gino or Bob the Builder

:D

I love it. Well crafted THRILL - er, Tony.

ChiefApache
10-21-2008, 07:59 PM
That is just pure genius!

cosmic12
10-21-2008, 08:05 PM
I still say it needs to in a
header somewhere

bootdaddy
10-21-2008, 08:07 PM
that's just great! makes me want to find my religion!

Buoy
10-21-2008, 08:09 PM
I still say it needs to in a
header somewhere

Have to agree.
I just wanted to make sure it was somewhere that everyone could see it - at least to view for now.
Can someone photo-shop it chiseled onto a pair of stone tablets and re-post?

MOBILEMERCMAN
10-21-2008, 08:15 PM
I still say it needs to in a
header somewhere

You can edit the thread title is you want.

MOBILEMERCMAN
10-21-2008, 09:38 PM
That is just pure genius!

Makes me laugh every time I see it.

DonziGirl
10-21-2008, 09:44 PM
It's funnier still to remember him trying to write it

" what are the 10 commandments? There are ten right?.... Are they all thou shall nots??? How do you spell thou? .. How do you spell covet? " :D

Tony
10-21-2008, 09:47 PM
I was drunk, now shut up and go back to the kitchen.

PARADOX
10-21-2008, 09:50 PM
I'm getting it framed and in the boat it goes. :rofl:

J-Bonz
10-21-2008, 10:27 PM
Here's one of my favorites of Tony's............................

Anyone else have "emergency beer"?

You know the dented scratched up skunky stuff that you found when you cleaned the cooler that has been riding around in the back of your truck all summer.


You absolutely can not bring yourself to throwing it away so you toss it in the very bottom drawer of the fridge.


a few months later low and behold you run out of beer late at night and there is no place open within 50 miles to get more beer.

You open the door to the fridge and catch a glimpse of the beat to hell can peering at you from the bottom drawer, your first thought "NO FUKIN WAY AM I DRINKING THAT VILE THING" and imidiately slam the door closed.


pacing the house for several minutes you finally talk yourself into drinking the "emergency beer" crack the can and tip it back expecting the worst............................................. ...........























































































hell, that chits pretty good.

J-Bonz
10-21-2008, 10:34 PM
One more.....................................

Ode to America's Youth
by:Thrillseeker


1. A ball cap is meant to be worn so that the bill points straight and keeps the sun out of your eyes, wearing your cap at some random pitch just lets everyone know that you need your head knocked around so it matches the pitch and direction of your cap, Also: wearing a hat with the bill as flat as a board is not cool, in fact it reminds me of my grandpa.


2. Keep on wearing them britches at knee level: it makes it easeir for the cops to arrest you when you trip and fall flat on your face.


3. Black lipstick: back in my day we made out with girls, not wheel bearings


4. Gold chains and ten pound diamond rings: your 17, everyone knows theyre fake so unless your Reggie Fountain, take them off.


5. Grillz: You will have plenty of time to wear fake teeth when you are older, but if you insist on having diamond lined chops then come over here and chew thru this concrete slab for me.


6. Your Dodge neon is NOT a cool car and it never will be, euro tails and a 3 foot tall aluminum wing on the trunk along with a fartcan tip, and a huge chineese symbol on the back window in vinyl does not make it look cool, or any faster... in fact it looks plain fuking retarded.


7. 30 inch chrome rims, reminds me of something I saw sitting in the Norfolk Southern rail yard. A good pothole should put a nice big flat spot in them, you will learn later in life when your on a first name basis with your chiropractor.


8. Myspace is not considered a sport


9. Clean work boots: unless they serve an orthopedic function or you are the worlds youngest construction site inspector take them off, sorry but they dont match baggy azz nylon track pants and a oversized Dennis Rodman jersey.


10. a hundred different pericings in your head makes it look like you tripped over your baggy pants and face planted into Hank Parker's tackle box, Oh and that Thai symbol that is tatooed on your neck translates to: hairy goat balls.





OK, rant over

BY U BOY
10-21-2008, 10:40 PM
I worked with a kid once that had one of those Civics with the wing and big weed eater exhaust,vinyl letters in Chinese and all. One day I asked a customer of mine that was Chinese what the letters said and he said and I quote "stupid white boy" :biggrinjester:

Buoy
10-21-2008, 10:54 PM
It's funnier still to remember him trying to write it

" what are the 10 commandments? There are ten right?.... Are they all thou shall nots??? How do you spell thou? .. How do you spell covet? " :D

You just better hope he remembers to spell "I do".:sifone:


I was drunk, now shut up and go back to the kitchen.

10-18-2008, 06:08 PM And already bagged - Early start - I like that.

Buoy
10-21-2008, 10:58 PM
Tony needs to Rant more often - I feel like I have a long lost brother.

Tony
10-22-2008, 08:28 AM
I cant take full credit for the Ode to Youth. I just doctored most of it to fit my point of view. :D

cigdaze
10-22-2008, 08:50 AM
That's some funny sht right there! :D :D

Sea-Dated
10-22-2008, 03:27 PM
Those are great