World's Dumbest Performance Boat Blog

[Matt Trulio]

Anyone need a laugh today? Take a look, http://www.boats.com/boat-content/2010/03/inane-performance-boat-blog/.

You can't make up this stuff.

[Big Time]

Maybe we can get Lucy to join SOS and give her "Icon" status? :rolleyes:

[cigdaze]

And after you're read up on Luxury speed boats, continue on to "Great Tips on Soy Candle Making Supplies"

:D

Thanks for the chuckle.

[GENERAL LEE]

Nice http://smiliesftw.com/x/roflwtf.gif (http://smiliesftw.com)


What exactly was the point of her even covering the subject? The rest of her entries are as random as they could ever be as well.

[Sea-Dated]

And after you're read up on Luxury speed boats, continue on to "Great Tips on Soy Candle Making Supplies"

:D

Thanks for the chuckle.

:rofl::rofl::rofl:

[Ted]

I was thinking high school project from an ESOL student, but then I remembered that was the name Craig uses when he's in drag.... Might be just a coincidence... Never know.... Jus Sayin' :sifone::sifone::sifone:

[Chris]

You can't make up this stuff.



Why not. Apparently Lucy did.

I was just commenting the other day how prolific the MAN diesels are becoming in our sport And those Mericruisers? Now that's an engine.

[Airpacker]

Number 6 gets my vote :)
6.Baja is a more technologically advanced speed boat that will bring you right into the 21st century with all its speed, control, and power. There is no other boat quite like it.

[HaxbySpeed]

"Not many boats can boast the speed and power of the Sun seeker."

I've been trying to tell people that for years.. :willy_nilly: :sifone:

[Tank]

Jeez Matt, I thought I was going to open this thread up and see a link to my blog!:eek::sifone:

I sh!t you not, my daughter did a 5th grade project report that read something along those lines (except the facts were a little less muddled).

While reading through it I thought, this is actually kind've cute. This has to be done by some little girl that has an interest in performance boats. Good for her.

Then I read the last line:

Lucy Bushman is an accomplished niche website developer and author.

:eek::eek:

[Tantrum]

I learned this

There is a book called "Twin Screw Tutor"
http://www.yachtsee.com/twinscrewtutor.htm
March 2nds blog "Design Your Own Boat – Important Things to Consider"

Unfortunatly it was not a picture book

[waterboy222]

16. One of the most popular engines in luxury speed boats is the Man V8 diesel engine.
17. Other engines used are the Mericruiser, Volvo, Ford, and Chrysler.

Sounds like man diesels and chrysler are givin Merc a run for their money!

EDIT: SOrry, let me correct my self, the "Meri-cruiser"


Of course, you have to make sure also that your dream boat complies with sound engineering, and you have to consider also hydrostatics as well as making a little mathematics work. You have to consider about your safety in designing your boat by making sure you stick to sound engineering principles. Aside from the design and technical specifications, you have to consider also the materials that you will use for your boat.............if you design your own boat, you don’t need to have past experience in boat building or you don’t have to be a genius in mathematics or engineering to be able to design your own boat.

Scroll towards the bottom of her blog and learn how to use sound engineering to build your own boat!

[jayboat]

Jeez Matt, I thought I was going to open this thread up and see a link to my blog!:eek::sifone:


I was expecting a 'PIMP OF THE NATION' shot at the very least. :ack2:

We should invite Lucy to become a member. :sifone:

[waterboy222]

reminds of this for some reason...

[mustang]

Ahhhh.....real commentary from an expert on the subject.

Perhaps it's time for a career change for Ms. Bushman

WzY3QV6MkGs

[Matt Trulio]

I knew your comments would be funnier than the blog. And that's impressive.

[Baja Fresh]

Number 6 gets my vote :)
6.Baja is a more technologically advanced speed boat that will bring you right into the 21st century with all its speed, control, and power. There is no other boat quite like it.

Me too! :D

I knew there was a reason I own a Baja. Nice to know it is more technologically advanced than those Cigs, Outerlimits, Nortechs, etc. ! :D

[sy goldberg]

This appears to be an outline for a second grade book report !

[Airpacker]

Me too! :D

I knew there was a reason I own a Baja. Nice to know it is more technologically advanced than those Cigs, Outerlimits, Nortechs, etc. ! :D

It must be. I read it on the internet :)

[Scotty B]

Very well thought out, interesting, and informative. I look forward to more of her insight on performance boating

[glassdave]

reminds of this for some reason...

That is the exact clip that came into my mind about half way through lol.


So painful to watch :huh:

lj3iNxZ8Dww

[McGary911]

crafts-n-things.thaigatpat.com

Watch your back SOS ;)

[cigdaze]

crafts-n-things.thaigatpat.com
Showcasing Bangkok's finest blogging talents.

:sifone:

[Chris]

That is the exact clip that came into my mind about half way through lol.


So painful to watch :huh:





Yeah- she probably has one hell of a time getting dates with an intellect like that ;)

[BOJOE2]

do her articles come in mens sizes

[SKATIN]

"18. People use luxury speed boats for taking out on the water..... " WTF else would you do with one?

[elvisali]

We have an expression in my house..."good intentions = bad results"...because no one ever tells me they had good intentions, and then tells me anything good.....I hope she had good intentions at least :)

[Scotty B]

The boat building blog has me thinking

Whether you are an enthusiast in boating or fishing and you want to make your own style with your boat, it is actually possible and doable.

Oh goody, I’ve always wanted to build my own boat and gamble my family’s life on whether it floats or not.

Do-it-yourself projects are not just about those small household items at home or some cabinet making projects and other small woodworks, but you can also design your own boat and do it yourself as well.

“I’ve got a hammer, some nails and an old hand saw, where do I start”?

Especially if you love spending some of your free time fishing, or going out on the waters and enjoying the sea on your boat,

And how I do!!

you would sometimes wish you can make a boat of your own design, of your preferred speed and make.

Yes, you’re right!! I want a boat with rocket engines and machine guns on the front. Oh yeah, I want a pool and a helicopter pad on the back. OH, MAN, THIS IS GONNA BE SWEET!!!

These days where the software for designing is readily available, you can indeed design your own boat and have a boat with your preferred performance and speed.

Wait, so I need Boat Designing /Naval Architect type software? Where the fuk I’m I gonna get that?? Staples?

Designing your dream boat may not be mastered overnight,

I should think not, but I’ll give it a try.

but by keeping in mind some important considerations and with a good software that can help you make three dimensional boat designs, you can indeed make a design of your preference and a dream boat indeed.

WOW, I can make a rocket powered, machine gun boat with the hydrodynamic boat software I get from from Staples. AWESOME!!

Decide and plan on your objective. Indeed, you want to make your dream boat but you have also to consider if the design in your mind is seaworthy, if your design fits the performance you want it to be and if your design can be built. Define what you want to build –

ROCKET BOAT

you probably want to build the fastest boat

ROCKET

or a boat with features you can enjoy,

Machine guns and a pool

whatever it is, make a clear plan and how you would work on it.

Of course, you have to make sure also that your dream boat complies with sound engineering, and you have to consider also hydrostatics as well as making a little mathematics work.

I’ve got a calculator (Staples)

You have to consider about your safety in designing your boat by making sure you stick to sound engineering principles.

Rocket = Fires backwards….Machine guns= Fire forwards…..Got it, that’s certainly sound engineering, I’ll tell ya’ wat.

Aside from the design and technical specifications, you have to consider also the materials that you will use for your boat.

You can also make a model to help you see your dream boat before starting with its construction. Although, in these times, designing has benefited much of advanced technology and you can already make three dimensional designs with the help of your designing software.

Next to the Turbo Tax program in the software isle.

Of course, being able to see a three dimensional picture of your boat allows you to save time in changing some of the features that you want to change and helps you perfect what you want for your boat.

You can also find 3D boat design software these days that has pre-set boat designs that you can freely use and alter according to your preferred design.Although there are important requirements and considerations if you design your own boat, you don’t need to have past experience in boat building

Thank god

or you don’t have to be a genius in mathematics or engineering to be able to design your own boat.

Whew, I might be able to pull this off then…because believe you me, I’m no rocket scientist.

LETS GET STARTED!!!!

[Ted]

The boat building blog has me thinking....snip


or you don’t have to be a genius in mathematics or engineering to be able to design your own boat.

Whew, I might be able to pull this off then…because believe you me, I’m no rocket scientist.

LETS GET STARTED!!!!


:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

Thanks goodness you have that big building to work out of, those rocket boats need room to breath:sifone::sifone:

[T2x]

I don't think she used the term "Luxury speed boats" enough.......

[Chris]

Yes, you’re right!! I want a boat with rocket engines and machine guns on the front. Oh yeah, I want a pool and a helicopter pad on the back. OH, MAN, THIS IS GONNA BE SWEET!!!



Statement cat?
;)

[Ted]

I don't think she used the term "Luxury speed boats" enough.......


Didn't Schwartzcraft trademark that phrase??:sifone:

[Wrinkleface]

That is the exact clip that came into my mind about half way through lol.


So painful to watch :huh:

lj3iNxZ8Dww

WTF was that???????:willy_nilly:

[Slandrew]

:confused:Luxury speed boat?It sounds good maybe she means the Sunseeker?

[Slandrew]

WTF was that???????:willy_nilly::iagree:She's hot screw the brains!:):willy_nilly:

[Airpacker]

The boat building blog has me thinking

Whether you are an enthusiast in boating or fishing and you want to make your own style with your boat, it is actually possible and doable.

Oh goody, I’ve always wanted to build my own boat and gamble my family’s life on whether it floats or not.

Do-it-yourself projects are not just about those small household items at home or some cabinet making projects and other small woodworks, but you can also design your own boat and do it yourself as well.

“I’ve got a hammer, some nails and an old hand saw, where do I start”? Home Depot

Especially if you love spending some of your free time fishing, or going out on the waters and enjoying the sea on your boat,

And how I do!!I like your idea of a fishin boat

you would sometimes wish you can make a boat of your own design, of your preferred speed and make.

Yes, you’re right!! I want a boat with rocket engines and machine guns on the front. Oh yeah, I want a pool and a helicopter pad on the back. OH, MAN, THIS IS GONNA BE SWEET!!!I recommend you put the rocket engines ON THE BACK :) and use 20mm cannons instead of machine guns

These days where the software for designing is readily available, you can indeed design your own boat and have a boat with your preferred performance and speed.

Wait, so I need Boat Designing /Naval Architect type software? Where the fuk I’m I gonna get that?? Staples?E Bay, better prices than Staples

Designing your dream boat may not be mastered overnight,

I should think not, but I’ll give it a try.Dream BIG

but by keeping in mind some important considerations and with a good software that can help you make three dimensional boat designs, you can indeed make a design of your preference and a dream boat indeed.

WOW, I can make a rocket powered, machine gun boat with the hydrodynamic boat software I get from from Staples. AWESOME!!

Decide and plan on your objective. Indeed, you want to make your dream boat but you have also to consider if the design in your mind is seaworthy, if your design fits the performance you want it to be and if your design can be built. Define what you want to build –

ROCKET BOAT

you probably want to build the fastest boat

ROCKET

or a boat with features you can enjoy,

Machine guns and a poolChicks dig jacuzzis :)

whatever it is, make a clear plan and how you would work on it.

Of course, you have to make sure also that your dream boat complies with sound engineering, and you have to consider also hydrostatics as well as making a little mathematics work.

I’ve got a calculator (Staples)Not sure why you would need "HYDROSTATICS" to drive your rocket powered boat but hey, maybe you could use them to run the anchor winch

You have to consider about your safety in designing your boat by making sure you stick to sound engineering principles.

Rocket = Fires backwards….Machine guns= Fire forwards…..Got it, that’s certainly sound engineering, I’ll tell ya’ wat.Like stated above, I suggest a planning change to move the rockets to the rear in order to avoid severe sun burn at throttle up :)

Aside from the design and technical specifications, you have to consider also the materials that you will use for your boat.No doubt the "Experts" at Home Depot can help you choose these materials

You can also make a model to help you see your dream boat before starting with its construction. Although, in these times, designing has benefited much of advanced technology and you can already make three dimensional designs with the help of your designing software.

Next to the Turbo Tax program in the software isle.

Of course, being able to see a three dimensional picture of your boat allows you to save time in changing some of the features that you want to change and helps you perfect what you want for your boat.

You can also find 3D boat design software these days that has pre-set boat designs that you can freely use and alter according to your preferred design.Although there are important requirements and considerations if you design your own boat, you don’t need to have past experience in boat building

Thank godIs experience in model building necessary? You may be screwed :)

or you don’t have to be a genius in mathematics or engineering to be able to design your own boat.

Whew, I might be able to pull this off then…because believe you me, I’m no rocket scientist.Paging CigDaze :)

LETS GET STARTED!!!!

Get er done Scotty

[LaughingCat]

That thing read like a lesson from Jor-el to Superman while in the Ice Palace.

[ericc]

So let me get this straight. I had to start selling pontoons because there wasn't enough writing work out there for me to support my family and SHE is getting paid for this? Go figure, LOL.

[Switzer It]

she forgot Switzer... lol

[T2x]

Didn't Schwartzcraft trademark that phrase??:sifone:


Yes, but only in an odd, yet strangely familiar accent. In fact I think this young lady may have done some publicity work for the Baron a few years ago.

[T2x]

So let me get this straight. I had to start selling pontoons because there wasn't enough writing work out there for me to support my family and SHE is getting paid for this? Go figure, LOL.

It's not who you know...........

[Matt Trulio]

So let me get this straight. I had to start selling pontoons because there wasn't enough writing work out there for me to support my family and SHE is getting paid for this? Go figure, LOL.

That you're not working full time as a writer proves how ridiculous, and frankly weak, publishers can be.

But that's a little off topic. For now.

[dykstra]

Wow!!!!

[baddogz28]

The boat building blog has me thinking

Whether you are an enthusiast in boating or fishing and you want to make your own style with your boat, it is actually possible and doable.

Oh goody, I’ve always wanted to build my own boat and gamble my family’s life on whether it floats or not.

Do-it-yourself projects are not just about those small household items at home or some cabinet making projects and other small woodworks, but you can also design your own boat and do it yourself as well.

“I’ve got a hammer, some nails and an old hand saw, where do I start”?

Especially if you love spending some of your free time fishing, or going out on the waters and enjoying the sea on your boat,

And how I do!!

you would sometimes wish you can make a boat of your own design, of your preferred speed and make.

Yes, you’re right!! I want a boat with rocket engines and machine guns on the front. Oh yeah, I want a pool and a helicopter pad on the back. OH, MAN, THIS IS GONNA BE SWEET!!!

These days where the software for designing is readily available, you can indeed design your own boat and have a boat with your preferred performance and speed.

Wait, so I need Boat Designing /Naval Architect type software? Where the fuk I’m I gonna get that?? Staples?

Designing your dream boat may not be mastered overnight,

I should think not, but I’ll give it a try.

but by keeping in mind some important considerations and with a good software that can help you make three dimensional boat designs, you can indeed make a design of your preference and a dream boat indeed.

WOW, I can make a rocket powered, machine gun boat with the hydrodynamic boat software I get from from Staples. AWESOME!!

Decide and plan on your objective. Indeed, you want to make your dream boat but you have also to consider if the design in your mind is seaworthy, if your design fits the performance you want it to be and if your design can be built. Define what you want to build –

ROCKET BOAT

you probably want to build the fastest boat

ROCKET

or a boat with features you can enjoy,

Machine guns and a pool

whatever it is, make a clear plan and how you would work on it.

Of course, you have to make sure also that your dream boat complies with sound engineering, and you have to consider also hydrostatics as well as making a little mathematics work.

I’ve got a calculator (Staples)

You have to consider about your safety in designing your boat by making sure you stick to sound engineering principles.

Rocket = Fires backwards….Machine guns= Fire forwards…..Got it, that’s certainly sound engineering, I’ll tell ya’ wat.

Aside from the design and technical specifications, you have to consider also the materials that you will use for your boat.

You can also make a model to help you see your dream boat before starting with its construction. Although, in these times, designing has benefited much of advanced technology and you can already make three dimensional designs with the help of your designing software.

Next to the Turbo Tax program in the software isle.

Of course, being able to see a three dimensional picture of your boat allows you to save time in changing some of the features that you want to change and helps you perfect what you want for your boat.

You can also find 3D boat design software these days that has pre-set boat designs that you can freely use and alter according to your preferred design.Although there are important requirements and considerations if you design your own boat, you don’t need to have past experience in boat building

Thank god

or you don’t have to be a genius in mathematics or engineering to be able to design your own boat.

Whew, I might be able to pull this off then…because believe you me, I’m no rocket scientist.

LETS GET STARTED!!!!

Machine guns and a pool.

I LOL'd. :bump:

[dmartiniup]

Blogging is obviously a very open way to communicate--you don't have to BE an expert, you can just pretend you are and write! Thank God we have REAL experts and bloggers like Matt who give people the real info but unfortunately, there is little we can do about the self-proclaimed experts who post their uninformed opinions--except let them know that they are off-base and should stick to their "crafts."

[GENERAL LEE]

So let me get this straight. I had to start selling pontoons because there wasn't enough writing work out there for me to support my family and SHE is getting paid for this? Go figure, LOL.

I doubt she gets paid for it if it's just her personal blog, unless it's just the tiny amount that Google pays to run ads?

If it makes you feel any better, I doubt whatever she's getting paid for that, assuming she is, would support a single person, much less your family.

[T2x]

I doubt she gets paid for it if it's just her personal blog, unless it's just the tiny amount that Google pays to run ads?

If it makes you feel any better, I doubt whatever she's getting paid for that, assuming she is, would support a single person, much less your family.

Easy for you to say, but over the course of a lifetime a person like that could make a few hundred dollars.........

or write something for Sean Penn to star in and make millions....

How does "Fast Times at Aronow High" sound? He could play Spicoli ( a luxury speed boat fan) and she could write his dialogue.

T2x

[Shockwave]

Lucy can spell gooder than some of us .
:rolleyes:

[Chris]

This is a gold mine...

I Googled Lucy Bushman-

Some other thoughts by Lucy

Pork has been called the other white meat but in my opinion, it should be the only white meat. It has more flavor and is juicier than the white meat of any fowl. There are many ways of preparing pork and especially the center cut pork chops. One of my favorite ways of preparing center cut chops is stuffed. Following are some stuffed pork chop recipes that I enjoy making and eating

Making a Living As a Make-Up Artist
By Lucy Bushman --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A make-up artist career can be a tricky choice. If often means starting as in intern with a movie company, photographer or television studio. It means learning the craft, either from an expert or through professional schooling. And then, almost always, becoming a freelance employee as many jobs are by contract.

And here's a link to a whole compendium of Lucy's works-
http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Lucy_Bushman

Daily Sport Newspaper Babes
How to Get Free USA Travel Guides!
Don't Line Dance to Snoop Dogg
Using a Printable Wedding Planner
Sexy Birthday Gifts For Her
Business Starting Grants - Using Grants to Start Your Business

...and dozens more. Including my favorite-
Choosing the Correct Gymnastic Leotard For Your Child

Who knew?


And of course- http://www.facebook.com/people/Lucy-Bushman/775920223#!

[GENERAL LEE]

Easy for you to say, but over the course of a lifetime a person like that could make a few hundred dollars.........

T2x


http://smiliesftw.com/x/laugh2.gif (http://smiliesftw.com) Nice

[Big Time]

Here is her relationship advice:

"Most guys would choose car babes if given the choice of their favorite type of babe, but car babes are high maintenance. The best type of babes are Daily Sport Newspaper Babes. They show up in the newspaper every day and reside in the sports section. Talk about a match made in heaven. Any dude that says he prefers car babes doesn't know enough about babes to make an informed decision."

This lady knows everything about everything!

[SKATIN]

Here is her relationship advice:

"Most guys would choose car babes if given the choice of their favorite type of babe, but car babes are high maintenance. The best type of babes are Daily Sport Newspaper Babes. They show up in the newspaper every day and reside in the sports section. Talk about a match made in heaven. Any dude that says he prefers car babes doesn't know enough about babes to make an informed decision."

This lady knows everything about everything!

What about luxury speed boat babes?

[JaJo]

I wonder if she knows how much she's being hated on? By Matt finding her blog (where did you find that anyway Matt?), she probably had more people read her gibberish than ever before.

If you want to read some real performance-boat blogs (after you visit Trulio's informative and entertaining SpeedontheWater.com), check out the ones that Marc Granet, Steve David and others (including our buddy Tank from the forum) are writing for www.powerboatmag.com.

http://www.powerboatmag.com/steve-david-s-blog/
http://www.powerboatmag.com/marc-granet-s-blog/
http://www.powerboatmag.com/tank-sears-blog/

[Matt Trulio]

http://smiliesftw.com/x/laugh2.gif (http://smiliesftw.com) Nice

Judging from the way that blog was written, and I use that term generously, it was a blunt attempt at Search Engine Optimization. The writer dropped the name of every performance-boat company she could find, probably through a Google search.

So why did she drop a lot of boat-company names? Odds are good she put all them in the meta-tags or keyword section of whatever content management system she is using. She likely did this in the hope that as search engine such as Google and Yahoo! crawl through the web, they pick up those names and place them high on their results lists when people search those names.

In a way, it worked. I was told her blog by a friend when it came up online in a Google Alert.

I love the Internet, but it is a very, very scary place.

[Ted]

It is fantastic to have people like you Jason and all of the bloggers you have picked for the magazine here with us. Perhaps we should seek out Lucy and add her to our talented pool of contributors :sifone:

[Chris]

Matt hit the nail on the head. If you can get people to hit your links site, you can get in on these affiliate programs that will pay you a couple pennies per click. There's a whole industry out there paying places like yahoo and Google to supply them with web traffic.

Search engines are becoming more and more useless- simply because of the myriad of websites out there cluttering up your efforts to find what you're really looking for.

[MarylandMark]

This is a gold mine...

I Googled Lucy Bushman-

I did the same thing and came up with the same results (prior to you posting you did it). She's a Google Whore:

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Google%20Whore

[JaJo]

I already sent her an email to see if she'd write for us ;)

[GENERAL LEE]

Judging from the way that blog was written, and I use that term generously, it was a blunt attempt at Search Engine Optimization. The writer dropped the name of every performance-boat company she could find, probably through a Google search.

So why did she drop a lot of boat-company names? Odds are good she put all them in the meta-tags or keyword section of whatever content management system she is using. She likely did this in the hope that as search engine such as Google and Yahoo! crawl through the web, they pick up those names and place them high on their results lists when people search those names.

In a way, it worked. I was told her blog by a friend when it came up online in a Google Alert.

I love the Internet, but it is a very, very scary place.


Matt hit the nail on the head. If you can get people to hit your links site, you can get in on these affiliate programs that will pay you a couple pennies per click. There's a whole industry out there paying places like yahoo and Google to supply them with web traffic.

Search engines are becoming more and more useless- simply because of the myriad of websites out there cluttering up your efforts to find what you're really looking for.


Yep, that wasn't the exact method I was trying to get at in my post, but exactly the same idea. Google, or whoever the counter party is, paying the site or blog owner more, with the more clicks & activity. Like Chris said, there are people out there that try using all kinds of various techniques, to squeeze all they can out of those systems.

I could see the return being considered pretty minimal to the bigger sites, in relation to the costs associated with maintaining a site big enough to see a considerable return? That, and the list of sites that Google alone has signed up to that program has to be HUUUGE, making it tough for even them to be able to offer anything significantly lucrative for using their program?

In her case, I'm sure it's a little something, but I'd still be surprised if ericc could support his family on it! http://smiliesftw.com/x/cooleek.gif (http://smiliesftw.com)

[GENERAL LEE]

I already sent her an email to see if she'd write for us ;)


Of course, that would be funny.... but that's probably taking it a little too far, no? http://smiliesftw.com/x/hsughno.gif (http://smiliesftw.com)