Something to offend everyone......

[txriverrat2001]

HOW MOSES GOT THE 10 COMMANDMENTS


God went to the Arabs and said, "I have Commandments for you that will make your lives better.
- The Arabs asked, "What are Commandments?"
- And the Lord said, "They are rules for living."
- "Can you give us an example?"
- "Thou shall not kill."
- "Not kill? We're not interested."

So God went to the Blacks and said, "I have Commandments."
The Blacks wanted an example, and the Lord said, "Honor thy Father and Mother."
-"Father? We don't know who our fathers are. We're not interested."

Then God went to the Mexicans and said, "I have Commandments."
The Mexicans also wanted an example, and the Lord said "Thou shall not Steal."
-"Not steal? We're not interested."

Then He went to the French and said, "I have Commandments."
The French too wanted an example and the Lord said, "Thou shall not Commit adultery."
- "Not commit adultery? We're not interested."

Finally, He went to the Jews and said, "I have Commandments."
- "Commandments?" They said, "How much are they?"
- "They're free."
- "We'll take 10."

There, that ought to offend just about everybody.

rs

 

[drpete3]

I love stuff like this.....good one

 

[Dude! Sweet!]

Where's the Irish!?

 

[Trim'd Up]

Where's the Irish!?

Ireland mostly. :sifone:

 

[fund razor]

Where's the Irish!?

Boston, New York, and a little in Ireland.

 

[fund razor]

Where's the Irish!?

At the bar. I am not sure how I missed this obvious answer the first time.

 

[Airpacker]

The Irish? Sitting at work BUT,being thankful it's friday so I can swail several brews tonight, thats where.

 

[drpete3]

Lets put the whiskey in the coffee

 

[Bobcat]

Where's the Irish!?

what's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish wake?








the wake has one less drunk !:sifone:

 

[Dude! Sweet!]

I've heard that there are roughly 5x more "irish" people in the US than there are in Ireland... And what do you know, I am at a bar.

By the way, I'm ashamed of all of you for not throwing down the line from Blazing Saddles just because you're afraid of quoting someone who dropped THE "N-bomb" :sifone:

 

[Bobcat]

"he says the President is near!"

 

[Dude! Sweet!]

"he says the President is near!"

Well played sir! Well played...

 

[fund razor]

I was dying to post "The Sheriff is a President??" but I was afraid.


oh crap

 

[Bobcat]

I am still afraid!:sifone:

 

[Perlmudder]

hahaha

 

[Dude! Sweet!]

The Jew, the Italian and the Red head gay!

http://www.videosift.com/video/The-State-The-Jew-The-Italian-and-the-Redhead-Gay

 

[cuda]

If it weren't for whiskey, the Irish would rule the world.

 

[fund razor]

If it weren't for whiskey, the Irish would rule the world.

Let's drop some Whiskey off over in Korea.

 

[Dude! Sweet!]

The Irish are just Mexicans who can't go out in the sun.

 

[fund razor]

The Irish are just Mexicans who can't go out in the sun.

You got a point there. It is just a matter of crops. The Irish got the stuff to make whiskey. The Mexicans got the stuff to make Tequila. They BOTH got the Catholic church.

Spanish people are different. Mexicans would have been Mayans but the dam Spaniards screwed it up. THIS is why we have no answer to the Mayan calendar.