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phragle
11-12-2008, 07:19 PM
I need a paper proof read APA argument.

Chris
11-12-2008, 07:20 PM
I'm pretty proficient at "marketing English" but your best bet is Fund. It'll give him a reason to take that fancy degree of his out for a spin.

phragle
11-12-2008, 07:28 PM
where is he hiding???? fundy where are you?????

Buoy
11-12-2008, 07:32 PM
Has anyone invited Puder??
He'll help you out.:sifone:

Hmmmm... Need to go back to the old board for a minute....

Tony
11-12-2008, 08:00 PM
Donzi, can probably help.

Edward R. Cozzi
11-12-2008, 08:13 PM
I was a proof-reader and typesetter for a printing company for many years. I always aced English and especially English grammar, so if I can be of help...

Trim'd Up
11-12-2008, 08:15 PM
I be really good at english, but I ain't know good at spellin':rofl:

phragle
11-12-2008, 08:23 PM
here it is... Im open to all comments, I know I still need to do the reference page tonite, it's APA style

stecz20
11-12-2008, 08:37 PM
its sucks, rewrite it.....:03::03:

Sea-Dated
11-12-2008, 08:39 PM
i suck.....:03::03:

:26::26:

Edward R. Cozzi
11-12-2008, 08:46 PM
Phragle:
Please do not take offense, but here's what I have found.

Your sentence structure is clumsy. You have several run-on sentences, some misplaced modifiers and a few dangling participles. If you want me to re-write the whole thing, it would be easier than trying to fix what's wrong. Sorry.
Ed

phragle
11-12-2008, 08:54 PM
damn..I suck and it's due in the morning.

phragle
11-12-2008, 08:56 PM
Ed for reference on how my teacher grades, this was my last paper, it got a 98%

MarylandMark
11-12-2008, 09:00 PM
Raul (orss)- none better... :biggrinjester:

03darkshadow
11-12-2008, 09:01 PM
Phragle:
Please do not take offense, but here's what I have found.

Your sentence structure is clumsy. You have several run-on sentences, some misplaced modifiers and a few dangling participles. If you want me to re-write the whole thing, it would be easier than trying to fix what's wrong. Sorry.
Ed



owwwwwch

Trim'd Up
11-12-2008, 09:07 PM
There ya go. Just get Ed to write it for you. Where were you when I was in college?:03:

Buoy
11-12-2008, 09:08 PM
Phragle:
Please do not take offense, but here's what I have found.

Your structure is clumsy. You have several run-on s, some misplaced modifiers and a few dangling participles.

That almost sounds dirty. Like a really bad audition for a porn movie...:26:

ChiefApache
11-12-2008, 09:30 PM
I need a paper proof read APA argument.

I proof technical documents/brochures all the time. You're welcome to send it my way.

phragle
11-12-2008, 09:34 PM
chief, it's an attachment on this thread agruff.doc...

MarylandMark
11-12-2008, 09:37 PM
You're welcome to send it my way.

Link on post #8 :)

MarylandMark
11-12-2008, 09:38 PM
chief, it's an attachment on this thread agruff.doc...

Ooopppssss- beat me too pointing that out.. :)

MarylandMark
11-12-2008, 09:38 PM
and my post is at the top of this page. :seeya:

Perlmudder
11-12-2008, 09:51 PM
interesting topic. now that you have brought up writing papers, thats what i should be doing right now! 2500 due the 20th and 3500 due the 23rd.

Bobcat
11-12-2008, 11:17 PM
That almost sounds dirty. Like a really bad audition for a porn movie...:26:

there is no such thing as a bad audition.( next!):26:

fund razor
11-13-2008, 07:12 AM
Phragle:
Please do not take offense, but here's what I have found.

Your sentence structure is clumsy. You have several run-on sentences, some misplaced modifiers and a few dangling participles. If you want me to re-write the whole thing, it would be easier than trying to fix what's wrong. Sorry.
Ed

First I started "correcting." Then I changed to "re-writing."

Then I stopped and came here to read the rest of the thread. :D

Some of the run-ons are actually two complete sentences and could be fairly easily divided. I noticed that the style was very opinionated, versus opinion dressed up as scientific fact... so my guess is that the assignment was to write it that way. (ie: argument paper for comp 101) It wouldn't pass the essay standard of organization. I assume that it doesn't need to in this case.

This is a fragment, with subject/direct object issues:
"A will full choice to love and nurture or to condemn and neglect by the parent."
My guess is that the parents in the prior sentence are the subject of this sentence and the choice is the direct object. Try moving the subject up front.
"The parents make a willfull choice....."

Ratickle
11-13-2008, 07:25 AM
I think Triple Digits has time to rewrite it.:)

phragle
11-13-2008, 07:58 AM
yep it's an APA arguement paper.

bootdaddy
11-13-2008, 09:20 AM
I used to write papers for a few friends on the goon squad (football team) at $5 a page.

The 1 strong recommendation to keep it flowing and comprehensive is outline, outline, outline...

And I don't mind dangling participles as long as they are "c" cup or better.:)

Between Fund and Cozzi an A is in the bag.

phragle
11-13-2008, 09:39 AM
Except I am now out of time, I have two A's one B shouldnt hurt to much, they always tell me C=degree.... but I am a bit of a perfectionist. Fundi and I are going to have to get together with cookies and beer for the next one though..

Edward R. Cozzi
11-13-2008, 07:47 PM
Ed for reference on how my teacher grades, this was my last paper, it got a 98%

Phragle:
This one is much more polished and exhibits almost none of the problems with the other one. Good show!

Heavy subject matter, though...way over my head.

stecz20
11-13-2008, 07:56 PM
hey fa ggle, you dummy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:03::03: